…. we hardly knew ye.
I think I've written before, expressing regret for all I never knew about my father's early life … questions I never asked. A couple of years ago my cousin and I tried - in vain - to fill in the gaps of our dads' early lives. Today someone might tag his family "dysfunctional" … but neither he or his siblings spoke of it.
Questions remain unanswered.
I've a photo and certificate commemorating his graduation from mortuary school … something he never practiced. Puzzled, not being able to recall if he was left handed like me. Or right. Heartbreaking to admit, I can't recall his voice.
… But man! How he enjoyed having his picture taken! More than 25 years after his untimely death, I like to think he's up there ... tickled to be spotlighted again. Thank you, Terri, for this opportunity to share my dad with y'all!
Adolf Biewend Willer
1912-1981
With his mother at the Cape (ca. 1913)
East Hampton, outside his father's church
One thing for sure … he loved nice clothing
… a Navy man.
Rather rakish, don't you think?
A sweetheart … a husband
A security officer (Los Alamos AEC, 1952-1981)
Personal aside: Some of y'all may have seen a recent episode of CBS' Whistleblower re. security at the National lab. Obviously, that generated lots of comments on the alumni Facebook group. One from a classmate whose dad held a similar post:
"If the stuff about the security is true, it’s a far cry from the way it was when my dad worked there. Everything was locked up pretty tight. And lax security would logically lead to people being tempted to take advantage. Those folks are the best and brightest, but they’re also human."
Now abandoned -- the back gate where my father spent many nights with his transistor radio. As a girl, I remember riding out there with mother to bring him supper.
A traveler in Jordan.
My dad's dream was to see all the world … darn if he didn't nearly make it!
Hands down, his favorite role ...
… being the best Grandfather in the history of ever!
(Yes, I cheated and 'doctored' this to black & white.)
* * *
Thanks for stopping by!
… and if you don't mind - before it's too late - please leave an audio memory for those you love.
We'll chat soon … be safe!
Hugs,
Myra
My dad was born in 1913 so just a little younger than your dad.. I like seeing him growing up and in the rakish photo he was a really handsome man... my dad was also very handsome at that age, he was 30 when he married mother and at the time looked just like the movie star Rory Calhoun.. most will not remember him..
ReplyDeleteThanks, Sandra! Yep, you knew I'd go running to Google … even tho the name didn't ring a bell, I remember Rory Calhoun. Wowzer!
DeleteWhat a handsome dad you must have had. Rory Calhoun was one of my favorite actors. I think this tells my age.
DeleteYou certainly have some wonderful memories of your dad, even though you may not have all the answers. My sister and I also have many times wondered and found no answers either about our parents lives. I've tried to share everything I could with my children so that they will have no cause to wonder about their dad or me. It's good to tell our stories.
ReplyDeleteIsn't it (good), tho? I never intended my blog to be in any way autobiographical, but perhaps it's not so very different.
DeleteI love this post! What a very interesting Dad you had. My regrets are the same as you - I wish I had asked more questions and listened more to his tales. I guess as children, we are more interested in ourselves. Your Dad looked like an Errol Flynn type!
ReplyDeleteSelf-absorbed, yes. I think you hit the nail on the head, Nonnie. Thanks so much for visiting!
DeleteGreat photos. Both my and my husband's parents are all gone (the last dying in the early 1990s). We didn't think to ask questions back then. Now we have questions, and there's no one to get answers from.
ReplyDeleteThank you, Kathy. Still sad, but now I don't feel like such a Lone Ranger. (Not asking questions.)
ReplyDeleteI am sure your father is very proud of you, Mevely.
ReplyDeleteMay I add a note to your last paragraph. A great gist one could leave their loved ones is a document about their lives. I have written a 100 page document of who I am, (family tree - or bush) how life was back then, what we did, what work, travels, where we lived etc ... etc ... A historical if somewhat personal document only to be read by loved ones.
God bless.
That's a splendid idea, Victor! After all, these days I've nothing but time on my hands.
DeleteThat was great advice about the audio memory. I know my mom and sister worked on a book of photos and she recorded my mom's voice as she was telling about the pictures. I was supposed to get a copy of everything, LOL, better remind my sister (my mom passed 12 years ago).
ReplyDeleteGreat pictures of your dad! He was a very handsome man!
We always think we will have our parents with us so we don't think about things that we might want to ask them until unfortunately it is too late. I think we all have unanswered questions.
betty
Oh, I hope your sister does provide you with those treasures. You're right. As a child - even a young woman - it never occurred to me that my parents wouldn't always be around.
DeleteI couldn't find your friend Susan :-( do you have the link? OH the Medicare system is ok I suppose. I decided I had to do my own thing. Everyone scares you no one shares the postive aspects of it all. I love all these photos! What blessings they are to you. I do have that audio recording of my folks. Grateful for it too. Recorded on a children's Fisher Price tape recorder. Oh my goodness, quality over quanity back then. My mom was lweft handed my dad right. He had exquiste handwriting like my two left handed brothers and two right handed sisters. HaHa! My mom had chicken scratch like me and I am left handed too. :-)
ReplyDeleteYour dad was a very handsome man. It's funny, our parents. My friend Sandy Lamothe had celebrity statis parents. HaHa! She is a very simple woman not much makeup or fancy hairdos and her mom was like an old time star like AVa Gardner or someone and her dad too. So so funny how were perceive ourselves and our parents. Miss mine terribly but hope to see them someday again. My dad had a beautiful strong voice filled with kindness and caring and greta love. :-)
Perception. That's a great point, Anne. What I'd give to visit with my father from the standpoint of middle-age! (er, senior citizen, but let's not split hairs!) Here's the link to Susan's blog:
Deletehttp://susan-swiderski.blogspot.com/
I'm sorry you don't have those memories but you do have some lovely photos of him. I do have messages from my dad on my phone that I will always keep.
ReplyDeleteThat's a great option, Debby!
DeleteYes! Audio/Video is so important. I don't have my mom or dad on tape and it is hard to remember their voices. Myra, the pictures you shared of your dad are so great! He was quite dapper, and rakish indeed! Hubba hubba!! :)
ReplyDeleteChuckling … he wasn't a vain person, but would have loved your comment, Terri. Thank you!
DeleteWhat a wonderful tribute to your father, Myra. I like the photos and your parents were really a good-looking couple. It's a shame that your Dad died at such a relatively young age.
ReplyDeleteIt's very interesting that he graduated from mortuary school but never practiced it. I worked as an assistant in a mortuary for about two weeks (when I was young) before quitting. I just couldn't take it.
My father was in the Navy, too. He was the head cook (!!). I know a lot about my parent's history - and yet there are many things that I still don't know.
An audio memory would have been great.
Thank you, Jon! I didn't realize your past included a mortuary. Dad's younger brother went on to make that a career (ugh), but was the funniest human you'd ever like to meet.
DeleteWhat an interesting life your dad lived! Son of a preacher...mortuary school (why would anyone go all through that and then not DO it???)...and that picture from Jordan! How awesome is that?!
ReplyDeleteInteresting to hear about Los Alamos. My stepfather went to a center in Jacksonville, FL for treatment of his cancer. There are other centers around the country now, but the technology they use came out of Los Alamos. He and Mom got to meet the doctor who developed it once when he was visiting Jacksonville while they were there. They were very impressed.
Really?! I vaguely recall something about a Meson facility being developed (after I moved away). That's fascinating, their getting to meet the doctor!
DeleteMy sister and I were saying just today, that there are so many questions we want to ask our parents and how sad it is that we don't think of these things when we have the opportunity to get the answers. How interesting your dad's life must have been. And such a handsome man! It is good that you have this picture history to treasure and to share. And thank you for doing that today.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much, Elizabeth!
DeleteFortunately for me, I know lots about my parents' early lives as my mother has filled me in over the years. After reading this and seeing your wonderful photos, Myra, I feel so blessed to have had the stories told to me. Yes, your dad was such a handsome man!
ReplyDeleteBlessings!
You are indeed blessed Martha Jane! Thank you for your kind words!
DeleteThanks for sharing. It's so great that you've "spotlighted" your dad. My parents have both passed away, and I understand what you mean about wishing you had more answers. I missed the opportunity to ask and record. Loved your post.
ReplyDeleteJan
Laughter and Consistency
Why, thanks Jan! … It's great to meet you!
DeleteI have two very small snippets of Richard's voice and they are among my most treasured possessions!! I wish I would have thought to do that more before he got so sick! This was a great share!
ReplyDeleteinteresting bout your father and mortuary school. i investigated going myself.
ReplyDeleteYou may not know all the details about your father's life, but you know the important stuff. Consider this: if he came from a dysfunctional family, his "real" life began when he met your mother. The other stuff was just background noise he may have wanted to forget.
ReplyDeleteOne of my uncles was a fabulous amateur photographer, so he was always taking pictures and aiming his movie camera at the family. His daughter is a professional videographer, and after her dad died, she spent hours and hours (and hours) turning some of those old home movies into a pair of videos... set to music... and sent them to me and some of out other cousins. It was one of the most thoughtful gifts anyone ever gave me. Seeing my long-departed grandmother and my mom and her sisters in movies from the '40s never fails to make me cry. Same for seeing my cousins and me as young children.
I've never done anything that ambitious for my children, but I wrote each of them a long personal letter to be given to them after my death. I know how much it would've meant to have something like that from my mother, and I'm hoping they'll feel the same way.
What a nice post. It was interesting learning a little about your dad. I too wish I had asked my mom and dad more questions about their lives before we came along. We know some, but I'd like to know more.
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